No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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