So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
