just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
