well you can't waste a boner
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
