i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize