So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize