thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
worst night to have a conscience
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
