But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
