I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
