I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
