And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
