I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
