never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
