In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
