why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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