How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
