so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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