hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
