I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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