Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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