He asked to "fluff my boner.."
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
