dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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