great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize