New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
