Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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