i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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