just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
