my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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