Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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