no. you can't hotbox the world.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
