My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
