David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Randomize
