Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
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