my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize