Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
