i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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