ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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