I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
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