we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
