If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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