Can Purell be used as lube?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
