at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
