if you like me you must not know who I am
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
