I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
