His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
