I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
