Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
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