OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
