you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
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