Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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