So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
My Sexting was not on an AP level
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize