I wish i was in the wii world.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
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